“You’re still emotional.”


Yes, Bob, you were correct.
My boyfriend, love, partner, soul mate, confidante, companion, lover, fiance, role model to my son and friend of my daughter, family member and “God” to one cousin in particular – of six years – cheated on me sexually and emotionally.
You disrespected all of us.
You lied, manipulated, betrayed and hurt all of us.
I don’t think you ever had so many people in your life that ever truly cared about you.
You turned your back on every single one of us.

Yeah. You could say that.
You told another woman you didn’t care what the consequences were, you were going to fuck her up one side and down the other. . . She begged you to take her away and you did.
You set her up with those like The Gates Foundation and whatever other grant monies that could elevate her career.
God forbid your mistress doesn’t have connections with cred! Over and over I was told that she’d do anything to add bullets to her resume and she had a history of infidelity, inappropriate behavior and targeting the men with the means to give her the lifestyle she desired. “Ruthless” was a term that was used to describe her. (Little inside jokeNow that has quite the double meaning, eh?)

“It’s all about taking risks” you told her boldly and proudly. I can see that puffed out chest of yours now. . .
Your mania was in full swing by that point. Even though your depressive side was extremely difficult for you and for me, at least you weren’t waiving your dick around, proclaiming you have more ejaculate than most.
You mailed her presents and planned even more.
You told her you never had been so open in your life.
You told her she was beautiful, intellectual, fun, and you got hard-ons regardless of where you were just thinking about her.
You plotted trips to the city to be with her. You just had to see her!
You put her project on the top of your grants list to have more reason to talk
You pushed to get her on your payroll.
You kissed her in an elevator and asked her what her father would think. You told her you were going to kiss every inch of her body. You described step by step how you were going to go down on her.

You told me she came on to you and you told her about us.
So, is she a slut or are you a liar?
Or both.
Yes, I’d say that  is the truth.
Do you even know what “truth” means?

You told me you’d rather quit and scoop ice cream than lose your integrity when it came to your career.
Then, you switched gears and told me nothing is more important than your career. I was a horrible person because I didn’t understand that.
You got fired and probably blamed everyone but yourself.
A “side effect” of having an affair with your Russian flag, as you referred to her.

I wanted us to be together forever.
Just like you always pleaded of me and insisted was the truth.
I was willing to move past your infidelity.
That’s something I never would have thought that I would ever consider.
I prayed, wished and hoped you would come home.

You have no clue what your affair did to me. To my children. To everyone who was in our lives.

I go over so much of what we had both experienced since we met.
You know I loved you.
Enough to still cry after all this time.
I am.

I dreamed of our wedding and the rest of our lives together.
I can still feel you in this house and in my bones.
Mos. Def.

Just kidding. . .
Why would I ever be emotional?


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Create a free website or blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑

%d bloggers like this: