So I’ll wait for you and I will burn

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I wonder. . .
Do you ever think of me and remember the us you swore was infinite?
Do you think of us when you pass by The City Winery? All of the great musicians you met with me?
When you hear Better Than Ezra, the goo goo dolls, Nirvana, Foo Fighters, Guster, Will Hoge, Mike Doughty, Shinedown, Tyrone Wells or Collective Soul? All of the music we downloaded to the Infiniti hard drive?
Tchaikovsky? Howie Day? Christmas carols? The Sound of Music? West. Side. Story.? “Bust a Move”? “Pretty Fly for a White Guy”?
Do you recall Nantucket? Boston? Gloucester? Saratoga Lake? Lake George? Sacandaga? Lake Erie? Champlain? The Caribbean? Chicago? Newport? Providence? Cape Cod? Cape Ann? Burlington VT? Montreal? Philadelphia?

What goes thru your mind when you see Dean & DeLuca? Hudson St? Prince St? The Sheraton SoHo? (When it was ours alone, before her) Loews? Mood?
Little Italy? The Met? Times Square? Fashion Avenue? Exit 13S on the Northway? Route 9? Union Avenue? The Egg? SPAC? Regent Street? The racetrack? The Stadium? Bailey’s? Broadway in Saratoga? The Horseshoe Inn? Manchester VT? Northshire Bookstore? Macys? The *Catatonic? (Say it three times.)

How about The Red Sox? The Fens? The Bruins? The Pats? The Rangers? MSG? The Steelers? The Astros? The Red Bulls? The Flyers?
Get the FUCK back in the net!”

Do you miss waffles? Macaroni and meatballs with homemade sauce? Pot roast? Sunday roast beast? Chicken and rice? Homemade muffins, cakes, pies, cookies and brownies? Grilled steak and potatoes? Meatloaf Guinea style? Baked ziti? Lasagna? Pork chops? Roasted pork? Prime rib and honey glazed spiral ham? Leftovers for lunch?

Do you regret losing me? Hosting Crazy Christmas? The Morning After brunch? Dinner out for Valentine’s Day? Red hearts and Cupid? Thanksgiving dinner? “This is thE best turkey EVER” The Wishing Well? Celebrating our anniversary? Easter egg hunts and brunch? Making baskets and filling stockings? St. Paddy’s wearin’ and decorating o’ the green? Roof tops on Caroline and Phila? Red, white & blue from Memorial Day til Labor Day? Cousins and kids and friends and our flop house? Hanging ornaments and lighting my parents’ resting place?

Do you still hate eggplant, spinach, croutons, mac and cheese, cereal, olives, almond milk, squash, pumpkin pie, mussels, straws, carbonated drinks, peanut butter and ice?

Do you continue to despise women who dress like men, non-accredited degrees, programs and institutions, country music, living in the heat and humidity, paying rent, dogs barking, The South, Canadians, the smell of Indian cooking and curry, ice in anything other than Jameson’s, traffic jams, The Yankees, alternative lifestyles and “speed bumps”?
Me?

Do you still remember when you loved us? Do you ever hurt? Just a wee bit?
Do you feel sad? Ever?
Do you think about how so many people truly loved and cared about you?
Does it occur to you how terribly awful so many felt when you left?
Do you stop and count the broken hearts?
Do you miss your cat?
Do you miss us? I know. . .
Who? When? What?
Never mind.
Of course you don’t.
Some things change with time.
Some things never will.

 

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