I wonder what my last thought will be the time that I lay down and never get back up again?
What will be the final thing that I think about before I won’t ever have to think anymore?
I can tell you this…
I just truly hope it isn’t how much I have come to loathe Bob C *****erty. (His name is always a first & last unit to me now . . .)
I’d hate for such angry, depressive, and negative feelings to be my last.
So my mission?
No, not to forgive him and the things he has done, but to not allow how he has made me feel to occupy my brain.
His infidelity and betrayal just cannot be the very last memories I experience before I die.
No. He doesn’t get to be my last thought. He doesn’t deserve that honor.
That, would be even more tragic than how he has made my life.
I simply refuse to give him the final tragedy of my death.
“Maria’s on the hill
She was all “side of her eyes”
A five-dollar wine has a blanket inside
Lay up the pages on a traveling bed
Watch the Blood of Christ Mountains, oh they all turn red
Maria’s got wings, she’s got legs for the sea
A captain’s coat and a note for me
Wake up Marie, before the season turns
Set your dash for the coast, watch the Sangres burn
She’s all smoke, she’s all nicotine
The songs in my pocket just crumble apart
Won’t you sing me something for the dark, dark, dark…”